It’s halfway past the first month of this ‘new’ year, and I’ve been seriously contemplating shutting down this blog. In fact, maybe stop writing altogether. Or maybe start a new blog. With a clean state, no history, no past. And then maybe I can reinvent myself, be anonymous. Be anyone I want to be but myself.

But the thing about new blog / new year / new self is this- it’s just an illusion. I can start a new blog every year, with a new personality/character, but for all we know- I’m still the same person. And unless there’s a time machine to bring me back to the past, I’ll still be here and nothing is really ‘new’, and we don’t really get a fresh start.

So no new year resolutions this year. No reflection about 2014 either. I’m just glad I managed to bring myself here to write something. Honestly after such a long time of not writing, I forgot how to write. And all the things I’ve wanted to write about has left me, and right now there’s only an empty shell waiting to be filled with new ideas/thoughts to be shared. But I’m not going to make a promise to self to write every day or every week or whatever, because the last time I did that, it ended horribly.

This year to me is a year full of uncertainty. I have no idea what’s going to happen to me- whether I’m going to graduate as planned, what I’d be doing after graduation, where I’ll end up etc.  But I’m done worrying. So I’m just gonna let it play itself out, trusting that things will work out just fine. 🙂

Signing off, xoxo.